Kick out the Monday Blues With Funny News

Today is officially the day when the rest of the World goes back to work so we thought it would be a good way to kick out the Monday blues with funny news from 2019.

Curiosity Nearly Killed the Cat

HM Haverigg, in Cumbria, got a surprise visitor when Padfoot the cat attempted a break-in. He somehow managed to shin up a 25ft high razor wired fence and was only spotted by inmates and guards when he was seen strolling round the high wire. An Animal rescue team had to use poles and a ladder to guide him to safety, and even though he nearly used up 3 of his lives, he was eventually brought down to ground.

RSPCA inspector Martyn Fletcher said:

‘I have no idea how he managed to get so far inside the prison and so high up the fence… He was able to move precariously on the top of the fence but this meant walking on razor wire. The poor cat was very scared and reluctant to be rescued. It took a lot of patience to bring him to safety.’

bet Padfoot won’t be doing that again in a hurry.

Mystic Veg and her Asparagus Tips

As well as being a flavoursome, versatile vegetable, asparagus is also a conductor of visions, well it is to one lady!

Meet Jemima Packington, the world’s only ‘Asparamancer’. This fortune teller who uses asparagus to predict world events, correctly predicted England winning the Cricket World Cup and the year of extreme temperatures. Her predictions for 2020 reveal that Donald Trump will be re-elected, but will be impeached again and kicked out of office. Go Asparagus!!

Say Cheese

Family photos can be tricky at the best of times, but imagine if that family consists of eight dogs and nine cats. Kathy Smith took a couple of test shots before setting up for the ‘big one’. Lining up the dogs: Ruby, Ben, Max, Sheba, Teddy, Rio, Mishka and Storm was hard enough, but add the unruly cats into the equation and things got a whole lot trickier. With a half ton of treats and a lot of dashing back and fore she managed to get that split second when all were sat facing the camera.

It didn’t last long and seconds after they all dispersed off to their own corners of the house. Kathy, not only has the cats and dogs, but she also has four budgies, several fish and is currently looking after a baby hedgehog. I’m guessing there’s an awful lot of love in Kathy’s home 🙂

Bats Out of Hell

Imagine waking up and finding your flat is home to a massive Bat orgy!  A young couple in Lviv, Ukraine discovered just that. Bat scientist Dr Andriy-Taras Bashta, was called in to explain the 1700 bats who in looking for somewhere warm and cozy found the high-rise building’s enclosed balcony. They soon settled down and spread over cupboards, drawers, and sacks of vegetables. The Bat expert explained they were:

engaged in what the bats do at this time – mating.

The invasion began with a single pair of bats, who’s cries were heard by hundreds of others who all followed into the warm, enclosed space. It took 4 hours to remove all the bats and around 80% of them were very young. Just batty!!!

Hope that kicked your Monday blues into touch! Keep watching for more 🙂

Image by Heiko Stein from Pixabay